Time check: Viaan is just under 2 months
You prepared for a child…great! Umm…did you prepare for a nanny?
In the olden days, as told to me by my father, one child used to take care of the other because there existed a battery of children. My father and his siblings were in all 7 brothers and sisters, the difference between the youngest and oldest being 22 years. It’s no surprise then that the youngest of my uncles calls himself ‘distantly related to his eldest sister.’
Cut to 2015. Joint families, especially in the Indian context and in the urban cities, is a thing of the past. No longer is it a common phenomenon where you see a child being raised by uncles, aunts, grandparents and siblings and parents merely playing a supporting role. If you and your spouse are working and you ‘cohabit’ with your parents, you would be naïve to assume that raising a kid is going to be a breeze. Yes, there will be support. No doubt about it. However, they signed up for YOU – not your kids. YOU signed up for YOUR kids. And so it continues.
So fold your sleeves and get going. Finding a nanny who is experienced, sincere, trustworthy and has values that align to yours is GOLDEN. Don’t get bent out of shape though if your search doesn’t tick all the right boxes. This is where the support of your parents kicks in. If one of them is around at home and can take the responsibility of supervising the nanny, it will all fit in place.
In my case, I was lucky to have got someone within 2 months of Viaan being born (credit to my father in law). It’s still early days to comment more on how the experience has been but I have crossed my body in knots and hope that things turn out well with her. Like most working mothers, my wife would be resuming work in some time. Maternity leave, as per current Indian Labor Laws, allow 3 months of paid leaves with a one month paid extension where there is a medical need (another blog at a later time on this draconian law….and that blog would also take ‘Indian labor law on paternity leave’ to cleaners). Without a nanny and a supervision at home (my dad in my case), it would have been quite difficult for us to figure out a continuum plan.
You might say ‘well…didn’t you think it through before having the baby?’ And my response would be: the decision to have a baby is an emotional one. As is the case in most matters of the heart – you prep some, you pray some. An adventure sport enthusiast would jump off the plane wearing a parachute after a brief training session. He is wired to believe that things will work according to a plan. That doesn’t stop him from praying that the wind will behave, he would get a good patch to land on and any unforeseeable events would be mitigated by his sheer grit and determination. It is after all – an adventure unparalleled.
P.S. if the reader is someone who got a nanny before the child was even born, I bow to your greatness.
satta king tw